Spoiled by Heather Cocks and Jessica Morgan - review

 

Deathbed confession!

Long-lost sibling!

Exclusive private school full of duplicitous bitches carrying designer bags!

Hot guys - gorgeous girls!

Shopping!

And you know, that's really all I need to do to booktalk this book to teen girls. Teen girls? Sure. Also tween girls, grownup girls, and a select few guys I know. We kind of love all those novels with fancy clothes and scheming.

It is my unalloyed pleasure, therefore, to report that Spoiled, the first novel by those Flaming Hot Cheetos of the Online World, the Fug Girls - is not only packed with Marchesa frocks and cutting remarks, but also with tight plot, coherent characterizations, and good god, a whole lot of humor.

It goes like this: Molly's mom died, but not before she revealed to Molly that her real father was not some Captain Walker war hero, but in fact, Hollywood superstar Brick Berlin. Molly jets off to Hollywood - for entirely believable reasons including grief and curiosity - where she meets up with the distractable but good-hearted Brick and his daughter Brooke, who is as single-minded in her pursuit of rule-the-school power as Brick is in his pursuit of the perfect Power Bar.

Is this going to go well? It is not. It is going to go deliciously, Mean Girls-ily, back-stabbingly badly. Yum.

 

 

Pretty sure Brooke Berlin is meant to resemble Boobs Legsly Blake Lively.

But amid all the decorative marble and the shoe porn (dark green crocodile booties, if you must know) the reader will be surprised to find a heart of gold. I don't want to spoil Spoiled, so I will make comparisons instead. Did you watch Veronica Mars (if you did not watch Veronica Mars, you should watch Veronica Mars)? Perhaps you are familiar with Clueless, then, or the character of Ms. Cordelia Chase?

I am alluding here to unabashedly fluffy entertainment that still manages to work in real heartache and genuine emotion. Much of Spoiled is rock 'em sock 'em social action, which Heather and Jessica write with imagination and gusto, but there are also scenes of confrontation and confession, which they absolutely nail . It's like when Julianne Moore played identical half-sisters on As the World Turns. Sigh. That was one of my grandma's favorites.

A few further things I like, before I set you loose to go pick up this thing so that you can slide it into your beach bag alongside Are You Going to Kiss Me Now? and Pink:

• I like that the conflict between Brooke and Molly is not over a boy. In fact, Brooke has "put her love life on hold for this semester to focus on her career" (she is directing and starring in a school production of My Fair Lady.)
• I like that both Brooke and Molly have demonstrable skill at something. Brooke seems to be a competent director and actress, and Molly does a great job with the costumes.
• I even like the way that Molly takes the high road despite being creatively persecuted by almost the whole school for kind of a long time. A little unbelievable? Why, yes. Her preternatural equilibrium while being slapped with Post-Its on her back and slurs to her face recalls the YA heroines of the '70's - Lois Duncan characters who respond calmly to ghosts and nasty stepmoms alike.
• I looove Brick. He is so cheerful, and so oblivious, and as wide-eyed as a toddler who has spotted candy. He's like Intern George playing dumb (which he does so well) or Harry Hamlin spoofing himself.
• I love "Grass-fed Half Orphan Makes Painful Choice to Leave Hayseed for Adequate Guitarist". Which is not a spoiler, because I'm not saying if she does or not.

 

Lastly, I love that this book feels like it was written just for me. I mean specifically for me, not just dedicated-to-Fug-Nation for me - on one page there are references to both Flaming Hot Cheetos and From the Mixed-up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler. When we took our boys to the Met last week to see the McQueen show, they remembered that the Met is where Claudia and Jamie hide out, and I could have died of love and pride. That was the first book I reviewed on this site. I know that other people will catch the references to Tyra (whom I saw at BEA in her I'm A Writer outfit) and Cop Rock and feel like it was written just for them.

There are just enough loose ends here for a sequel, but not enough to be considered sequel-bait. The bait is the book. I just want more. And so will my sisters and brothers of Fug Nation - the people I call The Brigade of the Raised Brow, The Hospitallers of Oh Honey No, the Get Some Pants on Gurkhas.

 

 

Comments

[blahblahblah]

hmmm. cheetos

[Laura]

YESSSS!!!! So excited to hear your recommendation. I'm leaving my office for the day and I'm totally going to buy this on my way home.

[ynl]

LL, it is funny and smart and soapy and secretly feminist. You have an enviable weekend ahead of you!

[marjorie]

I wish I'd liked this as much as you and Laura did, but I did get a kick out of it. Agree that Intern George (uh, I mean Brick) was a delightful character, and there were too many awesome lines to count. One: "She folded her hands underneath her chin and tried to look supportive, like Tyra Banks during the segments of America's Next Top Model where she counseled models to stay strong in the face of bad weaves or homelessness."

[Chelsea]

This is one of the best books I have ever read. It kept me reading for hours and hours at a time, I couldn't put it down